Lindsey, newsletter # 50
Nantes, Sunday 1st of November, 18-00.
The week consisted in two very different phases. Till Thursday… hell. On Thursday 5 pm, hope.
You can guess when this week’s two pictures were taken.
I was on holiday so I was able to be at home most of the time. Vikki was around also and Boris arrived fro the week end.
During the week end we were able to do some quite strenuous things like go to IKEA on Saturday at peak time. I had problems keeping up with Lindsey (but was also quite scared of losing her).
Lindsey, newsletter # 51
Nantes, Saturday 12th of November, 14-00.
And the weeks go by. Progress exists but is slow.
Only Vikki and me right now. And I had quite a lot of work so Vikki had to take most of the day shifts. Lindsey has been physically better, at least most of the time, but often very confused. This, until yesterday evening.
Then she got tired but seems to have recovered nicely after lunch, today.
Confusion means memory issues, long term (not remembering events from some months ago) and short term (what did you just say?). The hope is that none of this is permanent as there have been other moments where these symptoms were not apparent.
On the positive side a number of activities were launched this week:
On Monday, a roast chicken was produced, with Lindsey acting as chief cook: this means that the hard work was done by one of us, but the important decisions were taken by Lindsey.
On Tuesday we went shopping in a very large supermarket. This is not just physically hard work, it is also stressing. Having to go through dozens of different types of yoghurt, check sell-by dates and prices, etc… can be a complex matter. A new item appeared during the visit: a bonnet which she is now wearing all the time.
On several days long walks took place. This may seem spooky but a favourite walk is « to Cambronne and back ». This involves walking through the « Cimetière de la Miséricorde », which is the largest (and I suppose the oldest) cemetery in Nantes.
Ah, I see only those who have come to Nantes are convinced. I will have to have a special entry about Cambronne and the spirit of how things are done in Nantes.
On Friday, 11th of November and armistice day we went off to Bouin where we met our friends Sylvie and Hugues as well as their son Tom. We arrived early and had some time to enjoy watching the sea. Then lunch in which Lindsey bravely went for the couscous. And we followed on to see our friends Nadine and Jean who are also going through some tough times.
We have continued receiving encouragements from many. Some arrive to Vikki or to me, others directly to Lindsey. A special mention to the flowers which arrived from Catherine, Ulli, Nelly, Sylvie, Jacques, Thierry, Hugues and Pierre. This has become a habit! (but I have to say that none of the pictures of Lindsey with the flowers was able to show how happy she was.
Love
Lindsey, newsletter # 52
Nantes, Sunday 19th of November, 17-00.
A wet Sunday.
We did manage to find one hour without rain, which we used to « walk to Cambronne and back ».
I suppose this is as good a moment as any to talk about Cambronne. He was one of Napoleon’s generals, and became Maréchal de France a few months before the battle of Waterloo, where he became famous. When all seemed lost Napoleon in the Imperial Guards. The Guards were the elite troops many of which had been with Napoleon in the Campaigns of the last 20 years and had fought all over Europe. They were of course feared by all. Even on June the 18th, 1815. But that day the odds were against France and the guard was outnumbered. They were therefore attacked by the English troops who gave the French the chance to surrender, arguing that all was lost and didn’t need to prove their bravery. The French general Cambronne answered by the famous words: « La Garde meurt mais ne se rend pas », which translates to « The Guard dies but does not surrender ». The English cannoned and asked again for surrender. Again: « La Garde meurt mais ne se rend pas ». So more cannoning followed, and this time the answer was that famous French word (I believe it is the first I learnt at school): Merde!
When I was a child, Napoleon was studied at school each year. The History programme would start with the Gauls, teach us about the Christian king Clovis, then run through some obscure kings all called Henri and Louis, before getting to Bonaparte. And the chapter about the first Empire would end with the image of the French forces dying on the spot yet having time to swear and pronounce beautiful final worlds.
Cambronne was from Nantes and his tomb is a short walk away from the house. So it has become a favourite walk. And there is where, to my great surprise I found out that he died 27 years after the battle of Waterloo.
I understood, essentially that indeed « The Guard died and did not surrender », but this doesn’t mean that its leader, who pronounced the famous words, had to die.
I have even reached a private opinion that Monsieur Cambronne is quite representative of a spirit I am meeting too often these days…
Lindsey and I have become quite attached to Cambronne. On the 18th of June 2015, the day of the bicentenary of the battle, there was just one flower on Cambronne’s tomb, which Lindsey had deposited.
Lindsey… who has had a rather nasty week. Many moments of weakness. On Tuesday we saw the oncologist who was not happy with Lindsey’s condition and believed that it could be explained by an infection. So tests were done and antibiotics were given.
Things started getting better on Friday: walking was possible again, getting interested in things, going to the market, deciding to reorganise the house. We even watched the rugby match together (France Vs Australia) last night.
On Tuesday, Enzo arrived. Enzo is an Italian friend who shares his time between Montpellier and Calabria. Enzo is the father of Francesco who was Boris’ great friend through the years we were in Cournonsec. Having him around is proving of great benefit: he sleeps even longer siestas than Lindsey does and his pasta is delicious!
I have had one piece of good news this week. On Friday, Unesco wrote to me letting me know that they had given the Unesco chair at University of Nantes on Open Education for which I had submitted in May. The problem is that the chair will probably involve travelling quite a bit… So there are things to be sorted out.
Messages and tokens of support continue to arrive. Thank you all.
Love
Colin
Lindsey, newsletter # 53
Nantes, Monday 28th of November, 14-00.
On Wednesday, Lindsey started chimio. She has a 5-day cycle, then 23 days to rest till the next cycle.
As with all previous radical changes in her treatment, strange, new and unexpected things happened.
On Wednesday, I was in Paris (giving a talk to a « women in science conference »!) so Vikki took charge. She gave the pills in the morning and observed that soon afterwards Lindsey just « dropped ». Exhaustion. Even bringing her back to bed proved difficult. A couple of hours later Lindsey was up and bursting with energy (possibly too much). She then went on for a couple of hours during which time she was unstoppable. Until, all of a sudden, she was exhausted.
The next day, the same pattern occurred. This was worrying since (as usual) the doctors hadn’t presented me with this scenario. I phoned and was reassured that it was one of the possible things that happened in these cases. In the afternoon (Friday), as I was giving a talk in Nancy through the web and a robot (I will provide a video as soon as possible), Lindsey was running around cleaning the kitchen, eating, finding it difficult to rest. Then, just as I finished my talk, Lindsey dropped again. Back to bed, out for the count. Worrying, but also exhausting for us! Boris arrived later in the afternoon and Lindsey started feeling better again and we were all able to enjoy her company.
On Saturday afternoon Luisa and Jose arrived. They had flown into Orly, rented a car and driven to Nantes. It was of course great to have them with us. As they arrive in a high, we went off to Cambronne and back. Then Lindsey went down but was able to join us for the Haka: France was playing New Zealand.
Sunday saw Lindsey getting up and helping us prepare a huge chicken which was to be our lunch. Before that she had wasted time on the computer playing games. Actually, that isn’t such a waste of time since many different abilities are being tested.
So what started like a worrying week has ended up by seeing a pattern emerge in which many things can happen.
Love
Lindsey, newsletter # 54
Nantes, Wednesday 30th of November, 22-00.
Julie arrived today! She was allowed to see us pull upon the wishing bone. The bone came from the chicken cooked and eaten on Sunday. The tradition is that whoever gets the big half is awarded a wish.
And in this case…